Monday, December 31, 2012

100 Bible Verses in 2013

100 Bible Verses in 2013
This year one of my goals is to be more intentional about memorizing scripture. I’ve decided to join Shanna at Learning at His Feet and lots of others in memorizing 100 verses this year using the book 100 Bible Verses Everyone Should Know By Heart by Robert J. Morgan. Every Monday I’ll be back to share the two verses we’ll be memorizing for the week. Won’t you join us?
Genesis 1:1-“In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth.”
John 1:1- “In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.”
I will be using the NIV for all of my verses. I plan on incorporating these into our homeschool as well, so that my whole family will have memorized 100 new verses by the end of 2013!

Saturday, December 22, 2012

Practicing bokeh

So I know everything wrong with this photo; the biggest most obvious problem being the amount of noise. BUT, I’m determined to not shoot in auto anymore and I’m finally getting the hang of manual, so hopefully my pictures will improve again soon!!


Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Dear Josh

It’s been 54 days since you left us. We have good and bad days, good and bad moments within those days. My perspective has shifted so much that I live minute by minute, hour by hour, day by day now. If I feel like this, I can’t even begin to imagine what our mother feels like. Or our sisters. Or brother. I’ve witnessed the entire spectrum of human emotion since you left us. Sorrow. So heavy, never lifting, constant companion sorrow. Anger. White hot, unrelenting, threatening to consume her anger. Grief. She keeps telling herself you’re on vacation. She waits for you to walk in the door. She longs for your smile, your laugh. One who cannot process what he saw; who cannot let it go and move on. Who will not, maybe ever. One who retreats even deeper into herself; unreachable. Who live in fear now. Who can’t sleep at night. Who curl up in the closet because the grief is unbearable. Who don’t want to be left alone anymore. Who can’t talk about the pain. Who have nightmares.

Your absence changes everything. In ways I didn’t even know were possible.

I’m angry today, can you tell? Last night it was sorrow. Bone-deep, gut-wrenching sadness. Out of nowhere, at the end of a pretty good day, it hit me.

My brother is gone. Gone.

You made a choice. You chose to leave us. And now we’re left to deal with the aftermath of your decision.

Your death makes me question things I thought I was sure of. Fundamental, who I am and what I know to be true things. So today, I choose anger. Because there are still some things that I get to choose.

I miss you. We all miss you. I wish…so many things. But most of all I wish I had called you that day.

I should have called…

I am so sorry I didn’t call.

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